Individualism

Individualism is a cultural orientation that places personal independence, self-expression and individual choice at the centre. People are expected to look after themselves and their immediate family, and to define who they are through their own goals. Researchers such as Geert Hofstede describe it as one end of a spectrum, with collectivism at the other.

What individualism means

In a more individualist culture, the self is usually understood as separate and self-contained. You are encouraged to know what you want, say it, and build a life around it. Leaving home, choosing a partner or changing career are seen mainly as personal decisions.

None of this means people in individualist cultures do not care about family. The difference is in emphasis: where the line sits between "my choice" and "our choice", and how much explaining is expected.

Where the idea comes from

The Dutch social psychologist Geert Hofstede made individualism versus collectivism one of his dimensions of national culture, based on large surveys of employees across many countries. Harry Triandis developed the idea further in Individualism and Collectivism (1995), showing that both orientations exist within every society and every person.

Hazel Rose Markus and Shinobu Kitayama added a related idea in 1991: an "independent" self, defined by inner traits and personal goals, and an "interdependent" self, defined largely through relationships. These models are generalisations. They describe tendencies across groups, not how any one person thinks.

What it can look like in everyday life

Imagine your Dutch colleague announces she is moving to another city for a new job, and mentions in passing that she told her parents after she had accepted. To her this is ordinary. To you, it may feel almost unthinkable to make such a decision without your family's view.

Or imagine you moved from Colombo to Geneva with your husband. In the first year, people often ask "But what do you want?", kindly, as if the answer should be obvious and separate from everyone else's. You find you don't have a ready reply, and you are not sure whether that is a problem or simply a different way of being a person.

Another version: a second-generation woman in London, raised between two value systems, who feels selfish when she puts herself first and resentful when she doesn't.

In person-centred counselling

Many therapy ideas, including popular advice about boundaries and "putting yourself first", grew up in individualist cultures. They can be helpful, but they can also feel foreign or even hurtful to someone who values interdependence. Rogers' own idea of the locus of evaluation, trusting your inner sense of what is right, has sometimes been read in a narrowly individualist way.

A culturally aware counsellor tries not to treat individualism as the healthy default. If you live between cultures, you may feel pulled between both sets of values, admiring the freedom around you and also finding it lonely. The aim is to explore which values are truly yours, without pushing you towards either side.

The identity and belonging and family duty and self topics go into this further.

Related ideas

Individualism is not the same as selfishness. Selfishness is about disregarding others. Individualism is a cultural pattern about where decisions and identity sit, and it can include deep care for people.

It also differs from autonomy in the person-centred sense. Autonomy means acting from values you have genuinely made your own, which can include choosing duty, family and shared decisions freely. You can read more on my page on counselling for South Asian women and families, which explains why culture and context matter so much in how I work.